Wedding Story

I hate this show. They are forever showing repeats of it on TLC. Hate it. I hate big weddings. I've never even been to a big wedding. Shocking, I know. But I haven't. I've been invited, and I buy the present, and congratulate the happy little couple, but I never go. It seems like it's all for show. More for the family, than the couple getting hitched.

The idea of spending a billion dollars on dresses and cake and decorators, tuxes, flowers, food, etc etc etc just makes absolutely no sense to me. I got married at the courthouse, and it was perfect. It seems to be the norm for the womens to want the big fairy tale wedding. Especially when I'm watching these shows. Bridezilla. Dude. I never wanted to be that girl. I never ever wanted to look like a giant cupcake, I didn't want everybody and their dog fussing over my hair and "my how gorgeous she looks"...I never wanted to have to worry about getting my shoes dyed just the right shade of puke pink, or picking out the perfect little finger sammiches in the shape of hearts and angels. And I certainly NEVER wanted to invite all those people all for the chance to play the my girl-penis is bigger than your girl-penis game.

I think I'm going to hork if I watch one more second of this show. All the crying, and touching family moments, and emotional toasts, and future plans about children and their perfect home in the suburbs...

Must. Turn. Channel.

I'm weak.