Mom's At It Again

Sunday, January 28, 2007

I Could SO Kick Jodie Fosters' ASS...just not right now.

I am so damn tired right now, I'm about to cry. I couldn't sleep at all last night, so it's been over 24 hours without sleep...I'm starting to count the hours until my girls go to bed and I can take a nap before I have to go pick up the man from work at 12:30 this morning. Needless to say, it's taken all I have to stay awake today...I decided to look into some F.B.I stuff. Yup, makes sense right? But, I want to join the F.B.I. Silly, probably. But that's my dream job. So, out of curiosity, I'm decided to try to find a list of things that they require for you to join/apply/sell your soul....ok, so here's what I can find:

You've gotta be at least 23 years old and not older than 37. Got that one!

You've gotta hold a degree in law enforcement (I've started this one years ago...and someday I'll finish), computer science a foreign language or accounting. To which I say MEH?! Accounting?!

You've gotta have vision of no less than 20/200, perfect hearing, and weigh between 122-169 lbs (for my height)...check, check and check. Then there are the medical histories, psychiatric histories, credit histories, physical exams, medical exams, oral exams, the background investigation that ate Cleaveland....

Be able to speak (fluently mind you), Arabic, Farsi, Pashtu, Urdu, Chinese (all dialects), Japanese, Korean, Russian, Spanish, and Vietnamese....pick one.

You must have two to three years of law enforcement experience prior to applying, and preferrably a graduate degree in law...then if they decide you don't smell funky, they'll send you to Quantico for 17 weeks to be yelled at by a drill instructor who I'm sure looks NOTHING like Louis Gossett Jr. in An Officer And A Gentleman....

Mmmmmm....Louis Gossett Jr.....

Maybe I should just stick to wishfull thinking and watching Court TV. I'm way to easily distracted to handle all that pressure.

DeBarge - Rhythm Of The Night


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